I love the movie Titanic, even though we know how it ends. I love all of Kate Winslet’s dresses in the film. I really could’ve lived in that day and time, as long as I was wealthy enough to dress like that. There’s an iconic moment in the movie where she lets go of Leonardo Dicaprio’s hand so that she can be rescued. There’s a lesson to be learned in that.
It’s a weak analogy, I know. Her losing her love that lasted a few days is not nearly the same as losing a husband of 15+ years. However, she had to let go to survive. She had to let go of the past in order to move on. To some extent, we must do the same thing. We must make the tough choice to let go of the life we had, as well as the life we were going to have. If we live in the past, we can’t live in the present. If we hold on to the darkness that enveloped us when we lost our husband, it robs us of joy in the present and of hope in the future.
Letting go doesn’t mean we don’t cherish the memories we had. It doesn’t mean that we don’t still miss our husband. It simply means that we accept the life we now have instead of clinging to how life used to be. Letting go means choosing the joys of each day in the here and now. Life is certainly different without a husband, but it doesn’t mean that there’s not things we can still be grateful for and find happiness in. It’s not the same, but in order to survive this thing, we have to quit holding on to the future we used to have and start shaping a new one.
Some days, it feels that all the cards are stacked against us. We can take comfort in the fact that God still has a plan for us, and he also holds our future.
“For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans for welfare and not for evil, to give you a future and a hope.” Jeremiah 29:11